Tuesday, May 10, 2011

Mother's Day 2011



I am writing the day after Mother's Day and your birthday.  Sorry baby, I didn't have the strength to do it yesterday.  I was so sad that I couldn't even muster the strength to type anything. I was surrounded by people most of the afternoon, but could feel that familiar emptiness in my heart.  So I wrote last night before going to bed, but had a computer malfunction and lost everything.  It is just as well, because what I wrote was too sad.  I miss you: there are times that I still think how I would've given the last drop of my blood for you if you needed it.  I would've done anything to stop the pain, but you are gone, and the pain is gone.  You are finally at peace.   It is comforting to know that, my angel.
I was also sad that I didn't get to see your baby yesterday, so I called her on the phone today just to hear her voice.  And her voice echoes your voice... and I felt so happy!  After I finished, I went to my little altar in my room, where I have your picture and hers, and I cried.  I know you don't want to see me sad.  I am okay, baby.  I will go on living, but I will miss you forever.  I love you, my child...

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